Hey! Good looking!

Spring has sprung in the Monkey house so I thought I would show you what is looking good right now. Before you sigh despondently as you survey your green and brown looking patch, remember that we are a few weeks ahead of you down here in sunny Cornwall....although looking out of the window, it's more grey and misty Cornwall today! Living so close to the sea has it's drawbacks....

Just outside my back door, is a border at head height containing a sea of scented, pink Hyacinthus (hyacinth). The first year we moved here (1998) I planted three of these bulbs and I now have about fifty of them, dotted around the garden, all grown from bulblets....just wish I'd picked a more dramatic colour! Although the smell on a still evening is amazing.

 

These little chaps are Narcissus 'Minnow'. Sadly, the snails have been munching away. One of the disadvantages of a warmer winter is that many of the pests that get finished off up country, are able to over-winter quite happily. Down here Mollusk species will happily munch their way through my plants on all but the coldest of days. Backing on to the dunes also seems to put us at a disadvantage as they seem to flow over the workshop at the back of the garden. On rainy evenings you enter the garden and cannot find a spare inch to place a toe without bringing the life of several gastropods to a slimy end. No frolicking naked in the rain round here! (not that Ms Monkey frolics without a good set of thermals and a stout pair of boots, these days....not that Ms Monkey frolics at all!) In case you were wondering what the difference between Narcissus and daffodils was; the simple answer is none. Narcissus is the Latin name and daffodil is the common name...I will do an article about Latin names and why and how to use them

This beauty is Helleborus argutifolius (corsican hellebore) and belongs to the same family as Helleborus niger (christmas or lenten rose). I have planted several hellebores in my garden over the years, but they have all disappeared. They are extremely difficult to transplant and hate being moved, which is a shame as this one is grows to 75cm and I stuck it at the front of a border. It does so well that I am reluctant to attempt moving it and plants with green flowers are few and far between.

Erysimum (wallflower) do particularly well in my garden as I have an alkaline soil (we will do a bit about testing your soil in an up-coming article) which is particularly favoured by Brassica (yes, wall flower are from the same family as cabbage and broccoli...have a look at the flowers some time, identical....but they don't smell so nice). I have two different types of wallflower at the moment; the perennial wallflower Erysimum 'Bowles's Mauve' and the 'annual' wallflower Erysimum cheiri. I don't tend to treat my wallflowers as annuals, however, and just dead head them when they have finished flowering and they sit quite happily at the back of the border to come up year after year. The perennial; Bowles's Mauve, is a stunner and flowers all year round on top of a 2ft mound of silvery green leaves. With just the occasional trim to keep it tame, it grows easily from cuttings (we'll do an article about cuttings in mid-summer....I love free plants!).

Voila spring up randomly in my garden, I have bought them in the past and have a tendency to forget to dead head them and so they run to seed. Either that or they spring up in the wrong place and so get thrown on the compost heap. My compost doesn't seem to get warm enough to kill the seeds, so up they pop, where ever I dig the compost into the soil. Last year I had a vegetable patch full of them, they were allowed to stay as the flowers make a tasty addition to salads. Sadly these have been munched. Bloody snails!!

Forget-me-nots, Myosotis Sp. are such pretty little flowers, but have a tendency to take over if allowed. They are, however, annuals so are easily controlled by weeding. They don't transplant, so when they start to look tatty in mid-late spring just pull them out and shake them where you would like them to come up next. They make an excellent foil to smaller Narcissus like 'Minnow'. Shame these are growing in the veggie patch really!

Although the snowdrops are long since over a relative, Leucojum aestivum (snowflake) is out in the veggie plot (and so are the dandelions, damn them!!) I tried to get several shots of these but the camera insisted on focusing on Spitfire instead. Although she does look very regal.....Best not to look too closely, however, as she is going through her spring moult and her lovely long mane is turning into dreadlocks....which she seems to enjoy dropping throughout the house!

The tulips have been out in the parks and gardens around here for a couple of weeks, but mine are always a bit behind as they are planted in a north facing border that gets no sun until April. I've never really had a great deal of success with tulips. The garden is so exposed that the taller varieties get their petals blown off within a day. But these smaller varieties seem to be settling in....the slugs don't seem to like them either!

And finally, plant of the week goes to Corylus avellana 'Contorta' (corkscrew hazel). With it's bare branches, all knotted up, this is an really good shrub for winter and spring interest in the garden. In the spring the male catkins look lovely and if you look really closely you can see the female flowers just above, they are those tiny, red star stars.

It supposedly grows to about 4 metres in height, albeit very slowly, although mine has been in the ground for 12 years now and is still only just over a metre in height. It is grafted (the corkscrew part onto wild hazel) so does have a tendency to sprout straight hazel poles from the base. I cut them off in early spring (about now) and use them as canes in the garden. Unlike willow, they don't sprout into life when you pop them in the ground, so no danger of a hazel thicket!

Well, I hope you have enjoyed our little wander round the garden, now go and dig over your veggie plot, check your lawn mower doesn't need to go to the garage and enjoy the weekend! I'm off for a cuppa!

Seed sowing the Monkey way....Part the Fourth



An example of a seed sower

And so in this article we shall look at planting those fiddly little seeds. Now fine seeds are hard enough to deal with at the best of times, but when you have a disability that affects your fine motor skills, it can be nigh on impossible (sneezing at inappropriate times can be a real pain in the bum as well!). I tend to muddle on and hope for the best. There are apparatus available to assist those with disabilities. These suck up the seeds into a well and these can then be 'puffed' on to your planting media....but, I find them to be a bit 'scatter gun' in their approach with fine seeds and you might as well just blow them off your palm!

So for the purposes of this article I will be using Lobelia 'Crystal Palace' and Impatiens walleriana (busy lizzie).

The first thing you need to do is sterilise your trays and, as with the medium seeds;

• Fill
• Tap
• Fill again
• Strike off excess
• Compress

Got that?

Now, carefully pour your seeds on to your palm or into a saucer. The Lobelia seeds are small, but still just about handlable. Using your thumb and forefingers, scatter the seed across the compost, using an S shaped pattern from side to side. The turn your tray through 45 degrees....or is it 90? I was never very good at maths...basically, if you started with the long side facing you, turn it until the short side is facing you....(I think I got away with that!). Then repeat your S shaped pattern of sowing...if you don't have enough seeds to do this then you have bought F1 Hybrids and will probably need at least 2 packets....lesson, don't buy F1 Hybrids in their first year out...next year they will be cheaper or contain more seeds!

Lobelia seeds

Now we move onto a whole new ball game....I thought tennis might be nice, but perhaps later... Impatiens seeds are minute, there are smaller seeds such as those of Begonia or Tree Fern spores (like dust, not for the beginner or me), but Impatiens seeds are about as small as I would like to get.

Impatien seeds, and yes, that is my little finger

Now, bearing in mind that the plant world seems to have made these seeds the same colour as the planting media and the fact that you don't have senses fine enough to feel these little blighters; a little cunning needs to be used. The trick is to mix your seeds with a few pinches of horticultural sand (not builders, sand-pit or beach sand mind!). Now this stuff doesn't come cheap, but bear in mind that one, overpriced little bag of this stuff will last you for years. This way, you can see where you are sowing. Another little trick is to make a funnel out of a piece of paper and scatter your seeds, in the same S pattern as above.



It's now, just about, possible to see where I have actually sowed the seeds


The final task, before labelling and watering, is to cover the seeds. However, bunging a load of compost over the top is not a great idea as both seeds need light to germinate. There are couple of suitable options available; perlite and vermiculite. Again, these are available at large cost from garden centres; but again, a little goes a long way and the bags will last you for years. Neither of these have particularly green credentials. Perlite is a hydrated, volcanic glass (obsidian and water) which when heated to 871 degrees centigrade expands (a bit like rock pop-corn). It is useful because it is inert (neutral pH), sterile and holds water & air (although it's carbon footprint doesn't bear thinking about). It can also be used as a planting media in soiless systems (such as hydroponics...another time, dear reader). Vermiculite is a  hydrated laminar magnesium-aluminum-ironsilicate (Bet you feel better for knowing that...it's a bit like mica....still not clear, well never mind). Like perlite it is mined and super heated, where it forms shiny worm like shapes (there may be a technical term for it...but lets not get bogged down in the details). Like perlite it is sterile, inert and holds both water and air. Both substances also provide insulation for emerging seedlings as well.

vermiculite/perlite

So, lightly cover your seeds with a coating of one of these and label and water (from below....this stuff will go everywhere if you water from above...as will your seeds...so speaks the bitter voice of experience!). Just one final note...although these substances are inert, I wouldn't breath too deeply when scattering them about. They produce a lot of dust and I am not entirely convinced they are human being friendly.....just saying!

Right, that concludes our adventures into seed sowing....for now. I will be doing some outdoor sowing in the not too distant future, as it is a good time to be getting those broad beans out....however, I need to dig the soil over (as I haven't done it all winter) and I'm not too well at the moment...we have a large window though. I will also be doing a guide to seed packet terms and soon there will be seedlings to prick out! But for now, have a cup of tea (gin and tonic) and survey the fruits of your labour!

Seed sowing the Monkey way.....Part the third

Today, gentle reader....and all you not so gentle ones, we are going to look at sowing seeds in modules. I find this is the best way for sowing large seeds, such as Helianthus annus (sunflower), Pisum sativum (no sniggering; it's common or garden pea) or Phaseolus coccineus (runner bean). By growing them in modules you don't have to worry about all that nonsense with pricking out seedlings, but can transfer them directly into larger pots before 'hardening them off' (this means toughening them up a little before they go to face the rigours of the British weather....or, in my garden, almost certain death at the hands [sic] of the gastropod nation!).

These are modules:

There, that was the hard part of today's lesson. Now aren't you glad that's all out of the way! Now, you are going to have to make a decision now, not easy I know, but needs must! When choosing which module to use, think about the size of your seed and how big that little seedling is likely to be. Especially, if like me, you are a bit of a slacker and re pot when the damn thing is the size of a triffid and has designs on taking over the world!

Today I have picked Zea mays 'Mirai' (sweet corn) and Rheum rhabarbarum 'Victoria' (rhubarb) [Yes, that is the Latin name for rhubarb and not a Lady Gaga song.....although it could be her muse I suppose]. For me this is an experiment, as I have never grown either by seed before. I have high hopes for the sweet corn....but not much for the rhubarb, we shall see! I have selected these trays, more for the fact that they will fit under my propagator, and that I won't be committing the cardinal sin of placing different species in the same module (see part the second), than for any consideration of seedling size; thus rendering my previous statement null and void. But, do what I say, don't do what I do, as it will cause issues with pricking out.....and I also wish to sow several seeds as I am not convinced that this will work!

In a different module I will be sowing Lathyrus sp. (sweet pea), in which I am much more confident of success. If I plant my sweet peas in the autumn, for over wintering, I tend to sow them in old toilet rolls, so that they have room to stretch out their roots....although the last lot I grew in the autumn got munched by mice; I need to have a word with my moggies about dereliction of duty!

As before, make sure your module is clean and sterilise in bleach or other solution. Overfill your module and then gently tap against the work surface to remove air holes.....If you are lucky the module manufacturer will have left you a level surface to strike off the excess growing media.....Mine didn't!! Leaving me to 'make do'. Firm your compost with your finger tips....a tamper is not really needed as you will be planting below the surface of the growing media.

Bloody camera strap!!

Using a dibber, in my case a handy finger from my Swiss Army Hand (seriously, a pencil will do if you don't like getting muck under your nails.....although what you are doing going anywhere near a garden with that kind of attitude, I really don't know!) and make a hole large enough for your seed and deep enough for the seed to sit in the dark. No matter what it says on the seed packet I tend to use the first knuckle on my finger as a rule of thumb for depth.

These are the sweetcorn seeds. Sadly you can't see the iridescence from the photo, but they sparkled like they had been kissed by fairies....my hands on the other hand look like I've been digging through graveyard soil, looking for the fresh corpse of my vampire beloved, to administer the blood of life.....or digging for worms in the garden (note to self, baby wipes for the shed).

I planted these 2 seeds to a module, at opposite corners, and I will remove the weakest when....if....they come up!



These are the rhubarb seeds, I have gone for four per module, one at each corner....I have absolutely no confidence in any of these coming up at all! But, nothing ventured and all that!

The next step is to water the seeds, again I would recommend watering from below and using capillary action (there's your science term for today. It means the action of liquid flowing in opposition to external forces; such as gravity). Label your seeds (date and name) and pop them in your nursery, under a sterilised propagator. Now, sit back with a large glass of Bats Blood (it's goth red wine....I don't go round squishing bats, that would be wrong.....and probably wouldn't taste very nice) and wait (you may need more than one glass.....and more than one liver.....better settle for a cup of tea). Part the fourth will look at those fiddly little seeds...

Seed sowing the Monkey way...[part the second]

Today Ms Monkey will be showing you how to sow medium size seeds. I have to say that the size thing is all a bit arbitrary, in my head they are medium sized. If you want to argue about it, I will listen, smile pleasantly, whilst feigning interest and then ignore you!

So for today's lesson we will be sowing Lycopersicon lycopersicum 'Sub Arctic Plenty' (that's outdoor tomato to all you not fluent in Latin. We will do a session on Latin; which will be as clear as mud) and Allium schoenoprasum (chives.....for the rest of this lesson I will use common names....but I will feel ill in so doing!)

Step one: seed selection

Now I would have to say that brand doesn't really matter. Most seeds will have been rigorously tested to ensure a good germination rate. Check that your seeds are within date and as I have previously mentioned; try not to use old seeds, they may have a poor germination rate and those dogeared packets that you opened a couple of years ago and they were so successful? Yeah, bin them. By now they will probably be harbouring all sorts of nasty fungi! It's also worth having a little read on the back for any 'small print'. If it says "grows into 40m tree, suitable as specimen plant" and you have an 8ft square balcony, there may be an issue... If it says 'challenging', you might want to walk away...you will probably need to do all sorts of seed treatments and 'other halves' often tend to get upset about bags of damp sand, cluttering up the fridge, airing cupboard etc.

Step two: Equipment

Any receptacle will do, margarine pots....sorry, soft spread that isn't margarine or butter but is only one molecule away from plastic.....worrying, yes?? Where was I? Oh yes...margarine pots, fruit punnets, flower pots etc. As long as it's clean. I use these trays because I can fit two to a propagator....which leads us on to:

A while ago I took the decision to invest in some slightly more robust propagators. I've had them for about five years and use them several times a year. They are just starting to go a bit cloudy, but I reckon they will last at least this year. There are cheaper, light weight models out there, that can be purchased for less than a pound, check out your local pound shop, but for me they are a good investment....not least because every single moggie I own wants to sleep on them and there is nothing more frustrating than loosing your seedlings to 'cat nap attack'!

Pot tampers are not strictly necessary but will give you a lovely level surface to sow seed on. These can be purchased for stupid amounts of money or knocked up from wood off-cuts, you have lying around. A sieve is also a useful bit of kit for seed sowing....I don't own one, well I do, but it's green and in the garden somewhere....why do they make garden tools green? I mean honestly, neon pink would be garish but I wouldn't end up having to constantly buy new secateurs and trowels every year. Nor would I have to continually sharpen dints out of the lawn mower blades when beloved son mows them up (although beloved son doesn't seem to notice bright orange electric cable either....we go through a lot of electrical tape and fuses in this house, I can tell you!)

Good, quality compost. This is the one area I would spend a little money on. Check that your compost is suitable for seed sowing. There are a variety of composts out there (but that's another session!) A good multi-purpose compost should see you right, although there are specialist composts for seed sowing (one presumes that these negate the use of a sieve.....but one only presumes). I get mine off the milkman....I kid you not! It's a peat free compost, with fine particle size and it comes with milk, eggs and fresh orange juice! Seriously, it costs about the same as the garden centre compost but I don't waste my petrol fetching it and I don't have to do any heavy lifting (apart from the getting it to the workshop bit, but I have child labour for that)

Bucket of bleach..I warned you we would come back to this! Before starting everything needs to sterilised....except the seeds and the compost. Now I use a bleach solution; at roughly 1:10 bleach and water. No need to spend loads of money on posh bleaches. Bleach is bleach, let's face it. OK, some of it's thick, but we want thin bleach on this occasion. On a quick note, you will notice that my bucket resides on a raised table....OK so I run the risk of bleaching my jeans in the event of a topple (not necessarily a bad thing for an old goth like myself..I can claim it as a fashion statement....you'll just end up throwing them away, or saving them to wear 'round the garden' until the Health Visitor, Social Worker, Probation Officer, Vicar....[delete as applicable]...pops round and spends their entire visit looking at your shameful trews and not meeting your eye....). Where was I...oh yes, save your back; try and keep bending to the minimum. Use your knees, especially when lifting....unless, like me, you find your knees are knackered, again, child labour is marvellous....

Step three: Boring bit over, let's get our hands dirty

Heap your tray with more compost than you need and then gently tap it on your work surface. Again add more compost, without firming until it is brimming.

Strike off the excess with a straight sided implement (it needs to be longer than your tray/pot is wide....a credit card will not do!)

Firm down your compost and try to get it even.....bet you wish you had a tamper now! Be quite firm with this, you are trying to remove large air filled holes. If the roots hit large holes, THEY WILL DIE.....sorry to be melodramatic....letting my goth out again! OK, they may not die but it won't do them any favours, when looking for nutrients. Air pruning is often used by the horticulture trade to encourage root branching.....but let's not run before we can walk!

Your tray should now look like this...you will note that the compost has now been compacted to about 1cm below the tray edge. Your trays should always look like this (practise, practise, practise. A rough approximation will do....I'm just anal)

Next you will need your seeds, these are tomatoes.....................and these are the chives (the chives are a tiny bit smaller)

Use all of the seeds.....there is no point saving any until next year, as once the packet has been opened the viability will just keep dropping. You can always cull any excess (they're not puppies or kittens, they are seedlings....harden those hearts! You can always compost them), or give them away to friends/neighbours/random people in the street. You will often find that there will be a lot less seeds in a packet that contains an F1 Hybrid or new cultivar. This is because of the costs invested in breeding these varieties, but they are almost guaranteed to be true to type and no other company will be producing them (plant breeders' rights are very complicated and maybe we'll have a conversation about it.....when I've run out of other, more interesting things to talk about!),

Scatter your seeds across the compost. Try not to get the seeds too close together, it makes life very difficult when it comes to pricking them out when they have germinated.....we'll get to that if any of the little buggers germinate!

Ta-dah! There is little point in me showing you the pictures of the chive seeds...as they are black seeds on black compost (How very goth!).

Now both of these seeds like to germinate in the dark, and so a scattering of compost...about 6mm deep will suffice. Now would be a really good time to use that sieve.....if you have one.....and if you can find it! Alternatively, go through your compost; removing any large lumps, stones or twigs....damn that green sieve!! Do not compact this, just ensure that your seeds are covered.

Label your seeds as you go. Make sure you include the name, cultivar or variety (If you are growing more than one of the same. It can get annoying if one is ten foot tall and the other is ground cover.....nothing worse than trying to see the back of your border through temperate rainforest when you cock it up!) and the date of sowing. The seed packet will tell you how long it will take for your seeds to germinate (not in all cases, this is most frustrating....Perhaps they are low on ink?) and will allow you to make decisions about when to throw in the towel if nothing seems to be happening (did you forget the bleaching bit?).

Now water your seeds...Even if using a fine rose, you are going to wash seeds in all directions if you water from above. Put your trays in the sink and let the water soak upwards. I use warm water, after all, who wants a cold bath? Leave them to soak until you can see the top of the planting media is wet. then let them stand for a minute bfore transfering them to your nursery spot. No particular reason behind this; except that it saves compost laden water dripping all over your foot or floor...and Ms Monkey doesn't like cleaning at the best of times and she's not going to do it after you've been through!

Now an important note....don't go throwing those empty seeds packets away. Stick them in a box, draw, old sock...whatever? These packets contain valuable information about things such as planting distances, light requirements and general after care. Don't go thinking 'I'll remember'...you won't! Now I don't mind if you come running to me saying "Ms Monkey...at what spacing should I plant my cabbages?" I will tell you....but I might be ever so slightly condescending....and we wouldn't want that, would we?

Snug as bugs in rugs

Part the third will look at planting large seeds in modules.

Right, I'm off for a nice cup of tea and maybe a slice of cake....